Because Cornwallis is a jerk. I’m taking the bed. Because that’s how I roll.
Author: Wally
Jerks.
While I was relaxing at the hotel, they went all over flipping Paris. They had ice cream under the Eiffel Tower, rode bicycles down the Champs-Élysées, took a boat down the Seine, etc. Not fair.
Ah, Paris! Magnifique!
Pronounce that properly as "Pa-rie’"…. Not how the rest of the uncultured, unwashed masses says "PEAR-riS"… After a long flight of disrespect, ignominiously STUFFED IN TO A BAG instead of the first class travel I am entitled to, I was ready to relax and unwind once we arrived at the hotel in Paris. Especially after…
And away we go!
Finally, we’ve gotten off the dirt and into the clear, clean skies. It’s about time we got this journey started. Only many thousands of miles left before the overgrown ape gets out of his funk. AJ, don’t leave me with him again. I have to wonder about these Arkansans… One Jackalope appears on the plane…
Well now…
A noticeable lack of flying. This need to be remedied. Immediately. I wasn’t made to sit on the ground.
Heading out!
We’re finally at the airport! First Hotlanta and then Paris! It’s great to go out and see the world.
It is time!
Time for my European debut! I’m all packed up… but I’m noticing a lack of space for the two legged mule’s stuff. That’s OK, he has moments of awareness, lucidity even. I’m sure he’ll figure something out….
Friday night out!
I’ve heard tell of a luau! Time to go chase some hula bunnies. Since we’ll be in Fayetteville, maybe I can find some college cottontail to run around with. To the chariot!
The Compromise
The interloper and I have reached an… understanding. Despite his being a spotlight stealing little punk, he does have a point. I am much more valuable and adored than he, lowly intern that he is. He will be allowed to act as my representative on the trip with AJ, since she’s just going to go…
Betrayal.
I was all packed. Ready for 3 weeks at beaches and tavernas in Cyprus. And then the bombshell… She’s not taking me with. Some lame story about “being afraid of losing me” or me “getting dirty” or “possibly causing trouble at security checkpoints” (THAT ONLY HAPPENED ONCE!!!). And then it got worse. She introduced me…